LMAO!

what has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs?

an elephant with diarrhoea

Theres a green man, who lives in a green house
The green man went up his green stairs into his green bathroom
he took of his green clothes, and put on a green towel
then he turned on his green shower, and heard a knock at his green door
he went down his green stairs and opened his green door
to see a green woman, the green mans green towel accidently fell off at a gust of green wind
the green woman was so shocked she ran across his green grass
and onto the green road, where she got run-over by a green bus


Whats The Moral Of the Story: Never cross the road wen a green mans flashing

rofl, brilliant rudders

The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one day and started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion' around his ears when the customer yelled, "Don't put that c rap on me! My wife says it smells like a French Wh orehouse!"

Another customer who was waiting replied, "Hey John, you can put the 'Aftershave Lotion' on me... My wife has never been in a French Wh orehouse!"

Then the fun began...

A lady and her dog were enjoying a lovely stroll in the park. All of a sudden, her dog was mounted from behind by a large Rotweiler. The Rottie was really humping away and the lady was frantically trying to break them up, to no avail.

A small boy walked up and stuck his finger in the Rot's butt and the action immediately stopped.

The lady was amazed. "How did you do that?" she asked.

The little boy said, "That's my dog and he certainly can dish it out, but he sure can't take it."

It's a sunny morning in the big forest and the Bear family is just waking up.

Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?" he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?" he roars.

Mommy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and screams, "For Heaven's sake, how many times do we have to go through this? I haven't made the damn porridge yet!"

Brill jokes guys HA HA HA

Do you know what a wicker box is?

What Elmer Fudd wants to do to Madonna.

Who Came First?


A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette, with a satisfied smile on its face.

The egg, looking a bit p issed off, grabs the sheet, rolls over, and says, "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

oh pmsl!!

lmao thats a good one lol hehehehehehe

so, who did come first?????

the chicken i presume??????????

Oh PMSL yep the chicken AND........I bet the Chicken was Male!

It Depends if the Chicken was on a bus !!!!


My folks work in Steel and Iron.

My Dad steals and my mom irons.

Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk.

As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points at his foot and says, "Vietnam, 1969."

The other hooks his thumb behind him says, "Dog
s hit, 20 feet back."

What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes?

Goes-in-tight!