Conversation between a duck and a pharmacist:

Duck: I need some condoms

Pharmacist: What size, small, medium or large?

Duck: Large will be okay.

Pharmacist: Shall I put it on your bill?

Duck: Hey, I'm not that kinda duck.

PMFSL (Really hahaha)

PMSL

Did you hear about the transvestite at the Christmas party?

- He wanted to eat, drink, and be Mary.

LMAO

One guy asked his friend if he'd been getting any on the side lately.

He replied; "I haven't had any in so long that I didn't even know they'd moved it!"

LMFAO

LMAOOO

One for the lads

came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon.

That way a women can be at her best when she is at her worst.

"Miss Jones, we can't employ you as a model," the editor from the men's magazine explained. "It's too obvious that your blonde hair isn't natural, since the hair between your legs is black."

The model picked up a paperweight and slammed it down on the editor's fingers.

"What the hell did you do that for!" he exploded. She smiled sweetly and

said, "Look at your fingers. They're turning black, right? And they've only been banged once."

PMFSL ooooo stella ur goin worse!!

PMSL

Why did the woman with P.M.T. cross the road?



BECAUSE SHE JUST FCUKIN DID , ALRIGHT !!!!!

HAHAHAHA LMAO!!!!!!!!

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding on the range one day. The two came to a stop, where Tonto jumped off his horse and put his head on the ground to listen to see if anyone was coming.

After a few seconds he rose and said "Buffalo come."

The Lone Ranger was amazed and proclaimed "Damn you Indians are smart, how the hell did you know there were buffaloes coming?"

Tonto replied, "Face sticky."

EW!!!LMFAO!

LMAO!!!!

MOOOOOOOOOORE!! MOOOOOOOOOOOORE!! LMAO

Two cows were talking in the field one day.

First Cow: Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?

Second Cow: Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn't it?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

There was a pilot and he was flying an airplane. Suddenly, the plane started having trouble and it was spiralling down. The pilot, in utter panic searched frantically for a parachute.
Suddenly, in the back seat, he saw a chicken seating placidly there. The chicken looked at him and asked, "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

The pilot asked, "What are you doing in a plane that is about to crash?"

The chicken exclaimed "Oops sorry! I must be in the wrong joke!"

What did the male centipede say to the female centipede?


- For the hundreth time, spread your legs!