OMG LMAO

There was this old woman who heard a song called "Two Lips and Seven Kisses." She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name of the record company. In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, "Do you have "Two Lips and Seven Kisses?"

The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, "No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!"

So the woman asked, "Is this a record?"

To which the man replied, "No, its average!"

A teenage girl comes home from school and asks her mother. "Is it true what Jenny just told me? Babies come out of the same place where boys put their willies?"
"Yes, dear," replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter.

"But then when I have a baby," the teenager pondered, "won't it knock all my teeth out?"

OMG PMSL.
Ive Got one...



A Man stands in front of the bedroom mirror in front of his wife..Admiring his naked image he says "Look at that,12 stone of pure dynamite"

"yeah" says the wife.."Pity about the 2 inch fuse"!!





Get in! Wooo PMSL

PMFSL

I dont care, i know its old...but i dont care it's one of my fave all time jokes.....Ahem *clears throat (sts)*

Did you hear about the irish Tap Dancer???

He fell in the sink

OMG YOU TART! Lmaoooooooooooooo



Did You hear about the Irish paper boy?



He Blew away DUN DUN DUN!!

Two parents take their son on a vacation and go to a nude beach. The father goes for a walk on the beach and the son goes and plays in the water.

The son comes running up to his mom and says, "Mommy, I saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!"

The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are."

So he goes back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I saw men with dongers a lot bigger than Daddy's!"

The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are."

So he goes back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw and the more and more he talked, the dumber and dumber he got!"

ARGHHHHH LMAOOOOOOOO

A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary, so the man bought his wife a £250 see-through nightgown.

Later that night she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightgown was still in the box downstairs. Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said, "My word, for £250 they could've at least ironed it!"

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were
getting ready to go out on dates. The first
beau came to the door and said, "I'm Eddie, I'm
here to pick up Betty. We're going for
spaghetti, is she ready?"
No. The second beau came to the door and said,
"I'm Joe, I'm here to pick up Flo to take her to
the show. Is she ready to go?"
No. The third beau came to the door and said to
the farmer. "Hello, my name is Chuck."
The farmer shot Chuck.

PMSL I LOVE THAT....Really lmao

I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on with my real ladder.

haa!

P M F S L U nutta

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike.

Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.

HAHAHAHAHHAH

ROFL

PMSLLLLLLLL @ THEM STELL!!!

Now then...this will test someone's sense of humour !!

A man's car stalled on a country road. When he got out to fix it, a cow came along and stopped beside him. Your trouble is probably in the carburetor, said the cow.
Startled, the man jumped back and ran down the road until he met a farmer. He told the farmer his story.
Was it a large red cow with a brown spot over the right eye? asked the farmer.
Yes, yes, the man replied.
Oh! I would not listen to Bessie, said the farmer. She does not know anything about cars.

Edited at 18:12 Tue 15/05/07 (BST)