not today got work 2moz, up at 4.30 am

Awwwww *hugs* nvm...........

come on JOKE JOKE!

A guy goes to his doctor and says,
"Doc, I have a problem."
"My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday."
"I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all."
The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills 3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for any man. I will give them to you on the condition that you return to my office on Monday so that I can check you out."
The man says, "You have a deal Doc."
Monday morning the man returns with his arm in a sling.
The doctor asks, "What happened"?
The man answered, "Nobody showed up!"

PMFSL............u wanted a game?? im in members ok

lmao.... that was good.

U shud read his others haha.........




(Mornin Stella hehe)

hehe mornin Paula mwah xx new joke on its way soon

Nearly 2 hrs later..........*twiddles thumbs*

Come on Stella i really need a laff today i woke with tummy pains

This is worth the wait

Stella, who was holidaying on Bondi beach, couldnt seem to make it with any of the girls. So he asked the local lifeguard for some advice.

"Mate, it's obvious," says the lifeguard, "you're wearing them old baggy swimming trunks that make ya look like an old geezer. They're years outta style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Speedos -about two sizes too small - and drop a fist-sized potato down inside 'em. I'm tellin' ya man...you'll have all the babes ya want!"

The following weekend, Stella hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato. Everybody on the beach was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick!

So Stella went back to the lifeguard again and asked him, "What's wrong now?"

JESUS! said the lifeguard,

"Mate. The potato goes in the front!"

PMSL HAHAHAHAHA stella thats ace hahahahahaha

lmaoooooooooo oh yea it was worth the wait hahah







(Mornin again mate)

hahahahahaha ant looked on here much but tht was a gd one gonna av to come on this thread more

is there a reason y u used ur own name m8 ?

A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill
All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG shot the waiter
The barman came over and said You just shot my friend
the panda calmly replied Do you know what I am?
Why yes, said the barman . Your a panda.
Good, the panda nodded Now go home and look up panda in the dictionary. And with that the panda walked out of the bar
The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friends murder, so he went home to find his dictionary.
After a while, he found panda and quickly read the definition:

PANDA A black and white bear native to China Eats shoots and leaves

OH FFS!! lmao hahahahahh thats a gud one that hahaha

A man walks into a public men's room. His arms are held awkwardly out to his sides, forearms hanging limply, fingers spread apart. He approaches another man and asks, "Excuse me, but could you please unzip my fly?"

The second fellow is embarrassed, but feels sorry for the stranger, who appears to be crippled. He thinks how humiliating it must be to have to ask for help for something like this, so he complies, unzipping the first man's pants.

Next, the man asks him to hold his p enis while he pees. The second guy is even more embarrassed, but does as he is asked. Finally, the first guy finishes, and the second man starts to put his
p enis back in his pants.

"Oh, I can take care of that." The first man says, blowing on his fingers. "I think my nails are dry now."

HA HA HA HA HA

A Duke was hunting in the forest with his men-at-arms and servants when he came across a tree. Upon it, archery targets were painted and smack in the middle of each was an arrow.

Who is this incredibly fine archer I must find him

After continuing through the forest for a few miles he came across a small boy carrying a bow and arrow. Eventually the boy admitted that it was he who shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets.

You didn't just walk up to the targets and hammer the arrows into the
middle, did you

No my lord. I shot them from a hundred paces. I swear it by all that I hold holy

That is truly astonishing said the duke. I hereby admit you into my service.

But I must ask one favor in return the duke continued.
You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding shot.

Well, said the boy, first I fire the arrow at the tree...
...and then I paint the target around it.

lmaoooooo so much hahahaha good one Cuey

plenty more to come would you like another ?