Go for it Cuey..lol, but im sure cos its so late when i replied, its gonna be one of Stella's next!!





Mornin Stella

Morning Paula Here is todays offering....

A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch.

The seaman asks, "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies, "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."

"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about your hook"? "Well", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off."

"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"? "A seagull dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate.

"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?," the sailor asked incredulously. "Well," said the pirate, "it was my first day with my hook"

Wuv it

A man joins a big corporate empire as a trainee.
On his very first day of work, he dials the pantry and shouts into the phone - "Get me a coffee, quickly!"

The voice from the other side responded, "You fool you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to, dumbo?"

"No," replied the trainee.
"It's the CEO of the company, you fool!"

The trainee shouts back, "And do YOU know who YOU are talking to, you fool?!"
"No." replied the CEO indignantly.

"Good!" replied the trainee, and puts down the phone.

hahahaha Cuey

A London man who likes to toss....
Wayne Kerr. lol

WTF?? lmao i get it but erm a bit random wasnt it??

a man asks his wife to make lo ve to him and she agrees half way through he asks her to try the social security position to which she replies what the hell is that??????

he then says well bend over and when my bo ll oc ks are touching your ar se you are on FULL BENEFIT!!!!!

OMFG! *shocked luk*

















LMFAO!

If your lover has put on to much weight, get them to walk 3 miles every morning and 3 miles every evening......by the end of the week the fat git will be 42 miles away

Then there will be no-one to love and stella would be all alone..its not fat its love handles...

5 secrets of a perfect relationship..........

1. Its important 2 have a woman who helps at home, cooks, cleans & has a job.

2. Also to have a woman who can make u laugh.

3. Also a woman u can trust & never lie.

4.Also who is gud in bed, and loves being wit u.

5. And very very important, is that these 4 biatches, dont know each other !!

Edited at 21:14 Thu 1/06/06 (BST)

OMG! Dont start u 2 lmao


Wikkle jokey wokey pweeeze

Mornin Stella

hehe Morning Paula, joke coming shortly

The teacher said to young Freddie, "If there were three birds sitting on a wall, and the farmer shot one of them, how many would be left?"

"Well," said Freddie, "there would be none left because the sound of the farmer's gun would have frightened the others away."

"That's not the answer I was looking for, as we're doing subtraction today," said the teacher. But I like the way you're thinking!"

"I have a question for you Miss," said Freddie, the next day. "If three women were walking down the road, one licking an ice cream cone, one sucking an ice cream cone, and one biting an ice cream cone, which of the three was the married woman?"

"I think it would be the one sucking the ice cream cone," said the teacher.

"You would be wrong Miss," said Freddie. "It's the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"

PMFSL hahahahahahahahahhahahaahhaahahahaha even if they are about us girls/women!! hahaha

Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge.

One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge.

He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head.

The procession crosses the bridge and the man puts on his cap, picks up his rod and reel, and continues fishing.

The other guy says, "That was touching. I didn't know you had it in you."

The first guy responds, "Well, I guess it was the thing to do - after all, I was married to her for 40 years."

Paddy and John were walking along until they came to a bridge and there were two men, one of the men was dangling the other over the bridge by his legs and the dangling man was going under the water and grabbing all the fish he could find ..

Padyy thought this was a good idea and so he got John and threw him ove rthe bridge making sure to grab his legs .. and they begin...they caught nothing so after a while he says to John ... come on you must be able to get something...

"Sorry" John replies.. but pull me up a trains coming...

LMAO hahaha gud one Cuey