HAHAHA

Three Doctors are dicussing which types of patients they prefer. Doctor Watson says, ''I prefer librarians. All their organs are alphabetized.''

Doctor Fitzpatrick says, ''I prefer mathematicians. All their organs are numbered.''

Doctor Ahn says, ''I prefer lawyers. They are gutless, heartless, brainless, spineless, and their heads and rear ends are interchangeable.''

what do man u have that samantha mumba does not?
GIGGS

A husband and wife came for counseling after 20 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 20 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thought for a moment and replied, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."

Terrible!!!

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in
the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it is 3:00 in the morning!'
He slams the door and returns to bed.
'Who was that?' asked his wife.
'Just some drunk guy asking for a push,' he answers.
'Did you help him?' she asks.
'No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring with rain out there!'
'Well, you have a short memory,' says his wife.
'Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two
guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!'
The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the rain.
He calls out into the dark, 'Hello, are you still there?'
'Yes,' comes back the answer.
'Do you still need a push?' calls out the husband.

'Yes, please!' comes the reply from the dark.
'Where are you?' asks the husband.
'Over here on the swing,' replied the drunk.

lmao tid , bet that brings back old memories lol

x x

what do you mean old memories??

you being the drunk one being swung lmao x x

still doing it to this day x

what swinging ? lmao x x x

that too lol

*tuts* Page 4 Pffft

Q: Did you hear about the Irishman who went to the toilet?
A: He wiped the chain and pulled himself.

man=m
boss=b

a man rings his boss
m.i cant come in to work 2day
b.y not
m.i have anil-blindness
b.wot does that mean
m.i cant see my bum getting outa bed this morning

wot u think??

Good News.

Josef Fritzel will face the death penalty !!

Bad News.

John Terry is taking it !!

Paddys wife has had a tattoo of a Sea Shell tattoed on her inner thigh !

Its amazing, if you put your ear right next to it, you can smell the sea!!




LMAOOOOOO

OH! *tuts*







































LMAO @ THAT

A traveling salesman's car breaks down, and he walks over
to a near by farm. He knocks on the door and the farmer
appears.
"Excuse me sir, but my car broke down about a mile down
the road, and I was wondering if you had a place I could stay,
just until morning, and I....."
The farmer says, "Well, I can let you sleep in the barn, but
you'll have to sleep with my two sons...."
The salesman says, "Sons! I must be in the wrong joke!"


I LMAOOOOO @ that!!

Q: What do you have when you have two green balls in your hand?

A: Kermit the frog's undivided attention.