Wish granted, but when what you thought were aliens that you had just discovered, you realise that it is actually u_r_a_loser, who then proceeds to eat you and you die!

I wish I could "dance" with Kate Voegele <3

Granted, but she eats you, using a knife and fork, and you die!

I wish I was rich, and fairly famous, but not overly!

Wish granted, and as a result of your overwhelming fame and popularity you become president of the United States and get assassinated and die!

I wish Summer wouldn't say such heartbreaking thinfs

Granted, but she did heartbreaking thinks instead.

I wish the chickens could shut up!

Granted, but the crows start up instead!

I wish this final (Wimbledon) would never end!

But it did 24 hours ago!

I wish I was as tall as a healthy tree!

Granted, but you also became covered in bark and embedded into the ground!

I wish people didn't lie!

Granted, but they fib instead.

I wish I was not lactose intolerant so i could eat Smartfood Popcorn

Granted, but they discontinue Smartfood Popcorn!

I wish I had a job so I could get more money!

Granted, but you get fired.

I wish I was SPARTAAAAAAAAAA

Granted, but the Greeks decide to have a rebuild so flatten you!

I wish the sky was pink!

Granted, but it turns purple when global warming happens.

I wish i was rich

Pmsl, I can live with that! Besides: GLOBAL WARMING IS A MYTH!

Granted, but you become a victim of fraud and lose all your money!

I wish I lived in a bigger box!

Granted, but the box got broken!

I wish I owned a mansion!

Granted, but a meteor crashes into it the day after you move in...you're away from the house, and when you come back all you see is a large crater in the ground. As for the insurance...you get none-it's an act of God.

I wish we knew whether God existed or not!

Granted - but people would say he does and others say he doesn't (couldn't think of anything to say)



I wish I could find a undated 20P coin.

Don't! I had one, bought an ice-cream using it, then saw it on the news later that day!

Granted, but you gave it to me because you felt sorry for me!

I wish I read peoples thoughts!

Ouch that is a killer! I would give you it!

Granted - but they can `read yours as well.

I wish I could have a magic powers.

Granted, but you had to use bad ones on your self.


I wish I could do magic!

Granted but it all goes wrong and you turn yourself into a chicken.



I wish I could have a fast car.