Wooohooo new premises

*Please mind the wet paint*

Takes a seat and waits for first poster

OH LMAO @ THAT!

*wanders in and has a look around the new Gen*

WOW!! Its amazing Potty :D

*Sits down and purs the wine*

Mmmm nice wine paula

Hows u this fine evening

Oh one is smashing thanking you dear Miss Mc Lotty Mc Loo Loo..and how would your fine self be?

Oh no, new premises. I hate change

GET OUT THEN

LMAO OJ! We need you males here to change the bulbs etc

We have a very weird thing in the Maths office at uni about that.

How many Godas does it take to change a lightbulb?
10, 1 to hold it, 9 to turn the ceiling

:S lol

You used to the change now then

Next joke

An attractive blonde from Cork arrived at the Casino and bet
twenty-thousand Euros on a single roll of the dice.

She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm
completely nude'.

With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled,
'Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!'

As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed...'YES!
YES! I WON, I WON!'

She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her
clothes and quickly departed.

The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded.
Finally, one of them asked, 'What did she roll?'

The other answered,
'I don't know - I thought you were watching.'

MORAL OF THE STORY -

Not all Irish are stupid,
not all blondes are dumb,
but all men are men.

L M A O

Good one Warns

LOL warney

I am fine paula forgot my pills this morn only realised at 9 now i feell ikky but ok other wise lol

I might head off to bed in a min if the ikky feeling dont pass

A driver is pulled over by a policeman:

Man: Is there a problem Officer?
Officer: Sir, you were speeding.
Man: Oh I see.
Officer: Can I see your licence please?
Man: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Man: Lost it 4 times for drink driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Man: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Man: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Man: Yes, and I killed the owner.
Officer: You what?
Man: She's in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the man and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer2: Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please! The man steps out of his vehicle.

Man: Is there a problem sir?
Officer2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Man: Murdered the owner?
Officer2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car please.

The man opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer2: Is this your car sir?
Man: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving licence.

The man digs in his pocket revealing a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the licence. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer2: Thank you sir, one of my officers told me you didn't have a licence, stole this car and murdered the owner.
Man: Bet you the lying b*****d told you I was speeding, too!

Potty ~ *hugs* hope u feel better soon chic

Warns ~ Nutta lmaoooooooooooo

That's the end of the jokes Paula

But if you are ever caught speeding and there aren't any speed cameras about

Awwwwww You shud post lots on the Joke thread on fun and games ha, dunno if its been archived tho.

Speeding me? what Jogging?

Well we know you can jog extremely fast Paula

Ha and how do you know? :O You been spying on me???

Ermm, ermmm. Hasn;t the weather been nice lately

lol @ subject change warney lol

*HUGS* all round

anyone know speed limit for a treadmill ??? lol